I always get it wrong the first time

Sometimes you don’t get to study for Life’s Tests…but you can review the exam!

I recently heard a non-scientific observation that fiscally successful people don’t make fewer mistakes than others, they simply respond to them differently. It’s possible, actually, that they make more mistakes simply because they are willing to. They don’t fear messing up.

I’ve written before about how powerful mistakes can be as a teacher. But a new thought popped into my head today:

I always get it wrong the first time.

Literally, always. My first effort at something is rife with errors. Poor technique. Poor strategy. Poor understanding. I’m often terrible at something when I try it for the first time, which is common when tackling something new. What matters then, in terms of growth or becoming “skilled” at something, is how you respond to the mistakes. (Respond, not react.) A mistake is just the Universe reminding you something needs to be improved…it’s up to you to decide if you want to correct it.

And while this can apply to anything in life, think about the implications for romantic relationships. People are often emotionally jaded or bitter after their first serious relationship (or even second, or third), and think that:

  1. All relationships must be like this!
  2. Because all relationships are like this, there’s nothing to “get better” at.

Which simply isn’t true. My first serious relationship was riddled with mistakes — but that did not mean I couldn’t learn to “get better” at relationships…to improve my “relationship skill.” So use your mistakes, even in your current relationship, to boost your relationship skill.

 I always get it wrong the first time

1 Comment

  1. Bobz | | Reply

    One of my favorite go proverbs for beginners :

    Lose your first 50 games as quickly as possible.


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